Anonymous asked: jeaneren
What was their first kiss like?
While I think there’s an obvious reason why so many people would headcanon Jean and Eren’s first kiss as an so-angry-I’m-gonna-punch-you-with-my-mouth affair and I love that headcanon to pieces, I’d also like to consider the other possibility that their kissbuddy status started out in a more deliberate way. Like, they’re just these two hormonal boys who are in this high-stress environment, and I don’t mean an immediately stressful environment either (though it certainly is that too), but rather that slow-burn, no-end-in-sight stress that piles up and never really gets released because you can’t do anything productive to actually reduce the stressor. And maybe Jean would suggest it because they’re both tense and used to taking their tension out on each other anyway only beating each other up keeps getting them into trouble. Since aggression and sexual drive come from the same place anyway they might as well—and what the hell do you mean Jaeger, I’m not making this up I read it in a book once it’s totally legit and do you even read books and—and then Eren sort of has to kiss Jean because if he doesn’t then he will punch him and they’ve already established that will get them into trouble.
So basically I said I was moving away from the kiss-with-a-fist hypothesis and I lied.
Where were they their first time having sex?
Prolly the barracks or else whatever the traditional trainee fuckplace is. Chances are they aren’t even alone there but it doesn’t matter because privacy isn’t really a thing in their lives anymore and there’s this unspoken “If I see you in the love shack and you see me there we never fuckin’ talk about it because it doesn’t exist okay” rule. So yeah it’s probably some awful, rushed, dirty affair in a supply room and they both walk away limping regardless of who topped. They also probably trashed the place.
Ereeeeeeen. Jean is honest-to-god embarrassed for Eren because of how loud he is (but it’s also a pretty nice ego boost so even though Jean tells Eren to shut up, he doesn’t really mean it.)
Who wakes up first?
I’m not entirely convinced that Eren sleeps anymore, so he probably sits in the dark and thinks insults at Jean’s stupid-perfect face and pets his hair and hisses at people/rats/etc. that come to close.
Who performs/receives oral more often?
But if they don’t do it together at the same time then how can they know for sure who came first and who gives better head?
Who tries new things more often?
Jean just because he’s actually thought about sex before. I’m pretty sure Eren just sort of forgot to do that so he hasn’t built up a cache of kinks yet.
If they had to choose a third+ person to include who would they include?
Jean would want Mikasa and Eren would be like nOOoOo that’s my sister let’s have Armin instead.
Both sort of casually fantasize about Christa joining in, but neither of them see that as being a real option because Christa is hella gay with a hella gay titan girlfriend so yeah.
So I got a few more asks for the headcanons meme while I was sleeping and I will totally get to them sometime this afternoon, so worry not sweet anon!